Just in case it's raining where you are, too, maybe you are feeling like reading a nice poem from the 13th century... about
Bèrenger of the Long Arse.
If you have not read any fabliaux before, let me recommend them to you - they are a very nice, and very funny genre. At least I think so... they are also, quite frequently, garnished with a little or a lot of sexual innuendos. Sometimes not so covert innuendos.